Root to Stem- My new Nindo!
by Mika the Supreme Ninja
Summary: Death was common in the Ninja world, but rebirth that was something entirely different. Revived by Tsunade, without the Fox buried in his soul, Naruto struggles to rebuild his life. Gone was the power of the fox and here to stay was years of laziness and mistakes. Could he really rebuild himself and prove his worth, or was he really just a loser destined to be nothing?
1. Prologue- Death is the start

**I keep on trying this story, it is so hard for me but so worth the effort. I am trying people. **

**This was Inspired by Pulling my Weight, a Sakura Story. **

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Tsunade sighed, long and low, wiping sweat from her brow. Her hands shook, even as they slowly started to dry up, losing the chakra that acted as artifical collegen. Her body, which had been strong and mighty, whitered away until she truly looked the part of an old, ancient women. She didn't bother to hide, collapsing next to a very stunned Jiraiya, sharing in his agony and fear.

"He'll be alright... I think." Her words were empty, tired but powerful. "He's strong, he always has been. He has so much of his mother in him."

Slowly the Toad Sage nodded. "I know... but... I never expected... he was so still... "

She understood, patting his hand. " What happened Jiraiya… I need to who what happe-"

"Orochimaru." His declaration stopped her, they shared a pained familiar look. "We, I... I found Orochimaru's base, one of them here in the Land of Fire. We were just about to leave when a contact told me about it...Naruto over heard...I was told it was empty, so I took him... thought it might help satiate his need to help Sasuke… " Shuddering Jiraya turned from her, looking down the hall. " Naruto ran off impulsively triggering a trap, we were separated... When I found him, Naruto was battling something... do you remember my report when I took Sakura with Naruto and I to investigate in the Land of Rice, a base we found where a survivor of the Fuma clan became a chimeric beast of flesh?"

"How could I forget... I am still analyzing the tissue sample you sent back."

"We found another one... Naruto was bitten, it transferred another curse mark into his body but it was too unstable...as you saw..." Jiraiya shuddered for a long moment. " He screamed, he was so still for a while... then he had a seizure, two of them...the mark boiled off of his skin... Then he stopped breathing." Cold hate washed off of Jiraiya, he turned to her and she saw the man who destroyed countless people during Two Shinobi Wars. " I destroyed the attacker, then had Naruto reversed summoned here... he was dead wasn't he..."

She didn't want to answer, but couldn't lie to those eyes. "Yes, he was... the Seal contained chemicals that Naruto could easily bond with, he could easily become a sage I think.. but the rest of the seal contained something else entirely... it destabilized Naruto's seal, and... the chakra of the Fox ripped through Naruto's chakra coils and caused a heart attack... He died twice. Even though I revived him, he is no longer a Jinchuuriki… he lost the Fox entirely... he is entirely free of that fate... but at a cost. His chakra levels are great reduced."

Neither Sanin could manage to say much after that...

Both just stayed there, waiting and wallowing in the near loss of someone so near and dear...

Then Jiraiya said the very next words that came to his heart. " What is he going to do now, Tsunade?"

"What do you mean?"

"Without the Fox... never mind... what happens now?"

Confused and concerned, Tsunade allowed the change in topic. "He'll go into rehab to rebuild his chakra coils... and his body. He is in a coma now to heal... he might need to restore his whole body. Why?"

"Nothing... I... I'll be back." In a swirl of smoke, the Toad Summoner vanished, leaving a very confused Tsuande looking where he once sat, wondering where the hell he went and why he just up and left...

Thankfully, she didn't have time to wonder. She had to restore her chakra levels, so it was time to eat. No point in staying in her hag form any longer then she had to!

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**Chapter end, tell me what you think in the reviews. **

**Any characters I should include?" **

**Short but interesting, a great prologue I think. **

**Love, your Ninja Overlord, **

**Mika. **


	2. Realizations and Forced Hands

**This was delayed as I couldn't figure out how to motivate and get Naruto stronger without the Opness of Shadowclones... what could get the lazy boy to read and learn independently... I figured it out... and so this chapter was born.. **

**Enjoy.**

**After this chapter Naruto is the Main character... this was the rest of the Prologue so to speak. **

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"This is pathetic... how did he graduate?" Tsunade gaped at Naruto, watching the boy she loved as he sparred with Iruka. "He is slow, sloppy... he is showing no skills or technique. I wouldn't even call him genin level!" It was painful to watch, knowing what it would mean for the boy when she was done with this test. Turning to Shizune, who was standing next to her, she gestured to the papers in her hands. "How did he score in the academic's portion?"

"He failed it, he couldn't even answer what Chakra was..." Shizune looked as baffled as Tsuande felt. "How did he graduate my lady, there is no way he could have done so with... this?"

"I read his files... it turns out Danzo was right, can't believe I just said that." She shuddered as her mind drifted to the conversation she had at the counsel meeting just a few hours ago.

_"So the boy is no longer a Jinchuuriki." Homura sighed out, slumping in her seat. "We are doomed without the power to balance everything out, we have so few power houses anymore. We must fine and recover the Kyuubi once it reforms. Can the boy hold the power of the Kyuubi once more?" _

_Tsunade sighed herself, feeling the weight of the boy's loss. "No, he cannot. Naruto was filled with Sage chakra before he died, and a chemical I have only ever seen in the curse Seal Orochimaru uses. It burned out the boy's tissues, chakra coils and all the cells in his body. I used the residual chakra of Kyuubi in his tissues to regenerate his coils but they hardened too much to be reused as a vessel. Naruto's actual chakra has diminished considerably. You see he only has access to whatever chakra his body would naturally produce without Kyuubi's influence. In effect he may as well have never had or been the vessel of Kyuubi. The Sage chakra altered his cells. They mutated them then, caused mass divide but the new cells were without the effects of Kyuubi's chakra. They were pure, untainted by even a trace of that chakra. It was like he was reborn, almost cloned without the effects of Kyuubi's chakra. _

_His chakra levels are still high, he is an Uzumaki and that has not changed, but not enough to make any clones... or summon anything larger then a small toad. He cannot make a rasengan without a clone so that is gone. For a comparison, he has twice as much chakra as Sasuke Uchiha." _

_Kakashi, who was allowed in the meeting due to his relation to Naruto, frowned behind his mask. "Sasuke had enough chakra to make a clone though, I taught him the jutsu to make sure he could make the chidori."  
_

_"The shadow clone jutsu, like all jutsu, require a mix of physical and spiritual energy. Naruto's chakra has always been almost pure physical chakra but before he had enough chakra to force the jutsu. Now, without enough spiritual chakra to give them sentience, Naruto cannot safely make a clone. However he might be able to do regular clones with his reduced levels."_

_Nodding, Kakashi let out a huge sigh but it was Danzo who spoke next. "Then the boy is useless to us." _

_"The boy has done a great many services for the village, won a great many battles-"  
_

_"All due to the Kyuubi's chakra." Tsunade stopped in place, stunned by Danzo's words and everyone's nod. _

_Shukaku turned to her with a sigh. " Lady Tsunade, I know you care for Naruto but Danzo is right. Naruto has only ever won due to Kyuubi's influence. His fight at Wave, according to the report, was due to Kyuubi's chakra overpowering his enemy. His fight with Kiba was due to his stamina and healing factor allowing him to win by attrition so he could get lucky and fart on Kiba's face. His fight with Neji was a war of attrition, the Referee not calling the match when he ought to have and Naruto being able to unlock his chakra points with Kyuubi's chakra. He fought Gaara by using Kyuubi's chakra to summon the Great Toad. According to your reports he only managed to beat Kabuto, after you beat the man bloody anyway, due to being able to take a hit and use Rasegan which required Kyuubi's chakra to make the clones for it... he only managed to fight Sasuke at the Valley of the end due to the power of Kyuubi... You see every major event required it. He has shown no skills in combat... he shouldn't have even graduated ... if you do not believe my words, then check his files and watch the recordings on the chunin exams."_

And that was exactly what she did... watching the videos, reading Naruto's academy files... and everything she could find since he became a Ninja and what she saw was a textbook case of someone riding on a power not theirs, unable to follow orders or respect authority. Naruto had no place on a battle field...

And she hated that she had to tell him that... but first she had to reassess him, just to make sure. He redid the academy graduation exam, was currently sparring with Iruka and she tested his throwing skills and academy jutsu...

He only barely passed the throwing skills and trap making portions... and she had to give him a huge amount of credit for the creative Transformation, but nothing else.

Even if it would break her heart she had to do this...

"Naruto that's enough." The fighting stopped and she saw the raw of sunshine turn her, his happiness falling away as he saw her miserable expression.

"What's wrong Granny?"

She cringed, knowing that she might lose that loving title... " Naruto... I am sorry to say this but without Kyuubi's power to rely on... you are barely a genin level Ninja. Hell I wouldn't even call you a genin. I cannot in good conscious allow you to stay in the shinobi forces."

His eyes went wide. "But, I... I am already a ninja! I have to become Hokage."

"And you won't ever become Hokage with your skills... Naruto you can't even tell me what Chakra is. You've won every fight with Kyuubi's powers and none of your own. Everything you had that allowed you to pass it gone."

"But that's not my fault."

"Which is why I am putting you in the reserves for a month. I will give you one month to get back to Genin level, in all areas, if you cannot I will have no choice but to take your headband."

Silence, dead and cold, Naruto looking at her like she had cut off his puppy's head. It destroyed her to be the source of his pain but she had no choice. Love wasn't just about being kind, it was about caring for the person and being tough when they needed it.

Naruto sniffled at her, his eyes filled with tears. " A month, that's it... but I... What do I need to do? I can't make clones anymore... So I can't use the rasengan."

Sighing, she sat down and gestured for Naruto to do the same. Ignoring her crowd, she pulled the boy in for a hug before putting her hands on his shoulders. "I need you to pass everything the academy needs for graduation. Ninjutsu, taijutsu, throwing skills, the written portion... everything. You have a month to study, train and learn. I cannot let you have access to the library anymore, but you can use the academy books and scrolls."

She could taste his whining before he even opened his mouth. "But reading is so boring, why do I need to learn all that pointless complicated stu-" He froze, almost having a seizure as her chakra spiked.

"Naruto, do you think being Hokage is just about being strong? It's about being smart, knowing your history so you can learn from it and make better choices as a diplomat. It is about knowing battle tactics so you can make the right choices to save as many lives as possible. It is about having so broad a base of knowledge you can fill any roll in any area of the village and hire just the right person, or promote then knowing they will be an asset and not a hinderance...

Did you know the First Hokage was a healer like me but even better?" Naruto froze again but this time it was out of curiosity. "He could use any weapon, had a perfect knowledge of the body and barriers. He was a great sealer, taijutsu master and sensor and that was with his Wood style that made him so dangerous. The Second Hokage was a master sealer, taijtusu master, created the time space jutsu that made the Fourth so powerful and made a jutsu that could reanimate the dead and made the shadow clone jutsu you used. He was a sword master and a sensor and many other things. The Third was a master of all of the elements, knew every jutsu our village ever made that wasn't restricted to clans, was a great sealer, historian, taijutsu juggernaut, bo staff master, summoner... The Fourth was a sealing god, taijtusu monster, throwing weapon master, sensor... he made several jutsu all on his own.

They didn't become and stay Hokage just by being strong. They were smart, great leaders as children and with their genin and chunin comrades. They were respected and they earned it. Maybe they were meant to be powerful but they also earned respect, power and skill. They had their own advantages but they had to work it into true greatness. If you want to be Hokage then you need to do this too... you need to learn, read and grow.

I'll tell you what, since Jiraiya won't teach you anymore... I will give you this opportunity. If you make Chunin in the next year and show me that you are truly serious... I will train you to become Hokage. I will take you to meetings, spar with you, show you how to deal with paperwork and make hard choices. I will put you on missions to give you the reputation that you need to be taken seriously and one day become Hokage. But you have to earn it.

Can you do that?"

There was another bout of silence... and then Naruto nodded. " I think I can..." For once he didn't sound confident like she knew he was, and she wondered if perhaps this was the real Naruto... behind the mask of excitement and hyper activity. If he really was this little, lost boy looking for a way to prove himself. Somehow that made her feel just a little better...

"Now, since we are here... I want you to tell me how Kakashi and Jiraiya trained you so I can help you find a method that works for you. Everyone learns differently. I cannot train you as you aren't medic material but I can give you this much since you are important to me and have done a lot for this village."

She was not prepared for what he had to say.

'""

"And for you failure to teach Naruto almost anything, to prepare him and make him a worthy genin you both shall be fined three A rank Missions." Tsunade enjoyed the stunned look on Jiraiya's and Kakashi's faces. Both of them looked at her like she was crazy.

"Lady Tsunade, in all fairness Naruto has never exactly been a skilled Ninja. When I first met him he though Chakra was called Catra." Kakashi said, then dodged the sake glass Tsunade tossed at him.

"He passed graduation barely so it was your duty to get him to chunin level and yet you put him in the chunin exams when neither he or Sakura had the skills for it. I read the reports, you threw them to the wolves for Sasuke... who is the only student you taught anything of note to. You chose to toss them both aside during the chunin exams as well, giving Naruto to a man who has no respect for him. You shame yourself, this village and the Fourth with your inaction. You will also be fined the same for your neglect of Sakura. I am appalled at how behind she is despite having been put in the chunin exams. You disgust me."

Done with Kakashi, who was deflated, she turned to Jiraiya who actually flinched at her hateful glare. " He is your godson, you abandoned him his entire life then tossed him down a canyon you had no way to save him from should he fail to summon the Kyuubi's power? You barely taught him the rasegan, he explained it to me, you went to bars and brothels while giving the barest explanations. The kid is a freaking genius if he could manage it on his own like that, I don't doubt he will pass my test. Why did you not correct his taijutsu? He was facing Neji Hyuuga... or when you were on your trip? It seems to me all you wanted out of him was a perfect Jinchuuriki and not a capable ninja." The look in Jiraiya's face told her everything. "That is what you wanted wasn't it... you wanted him to be a Jinchuuriki... you perfect fool. Kushina wasn't a perfect Jinchuuriki and she was stronger then me.. My grandmother was comparable to My Uncle and she barely used Kyuubi's power. We have never relied on it's power, we teach our Jinchuurki to be great on their own. No... you cannot explain this away. I don't want to hear it.

Other then your fine, you will be assigned a series of A and S rank missions for the next two years you would have been on the trip with Naruto. Staring immediately... both of you actually. You will also be writing down the Rasegan and Chidori so I can have others learn it. Naruto has already agreed by the way Jiraiya so you can't squirrel your way out of it. I expect a scroll of each on my desk by the morning before you leave for your missions. You are dismissed."

Both men, silently and with great pain, turned and walked out of her office, neither were very happy but neither able to say a word.

She didn't care for their pain, for their worries. She just needed to undo the damage as much as she could... and she only had so much time for it...

'_The rest is up to you Naruto. I punished your neglectful teachers but you need to work on your laziness and sense of entitlement... can you become Hokage or are you destined for mediocrity ... I believe in you, now you just need to prove me right...'_

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_**Chapter end, tell me what you think in the reviews. **_

_**This was beyond fun to write and has been in my brain all day. **_

_**Love, your Ninja Overlord, **_

_**Mika. ** _


	3. New Goals

**This won't be super long due to nothing showing up on Fanfiction... so you don't miss a lot.  
**

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Naruto had never felt so tired, not for so long and for seemingly no reason. Not when he fought Gaara, or Haku or even when he fought Sasuke. It was ridiculous how he felt, from the moment he woke up from that attack that weird creature in Orochimaru's base...he just felt empty, drained. Granny Tsunade had told him it was because the Fox was gone, so he wasn't being flooded in the rush of energy of it's power at all times. He hadn't realize how much power it had given him over the years just living in him. How much energy it had pumped into his body that just... lay there, even when he wasn't using it outright.

Kami, he could remember when he first woke up, feeling so utterly drained that he could barely move. The sound of Tsunade's voice just barely leading him to the realm of consciousness.

_'Why are my eyelids so heavy... why is everything so heavy...' Naruto struggled to even opened his eyes, unable to fully move like his muscles were fill with some cold heavy liquid. 'I can't get up, I can't get up, I CAN'T GET UP!' He wanted to scream, panic, do something other then lay still trapped in his own body. However even his panic seemed to be weighed down by that cold, liquidy feeling._

_Shaking inside, he fought against the feeling for what felt like days, getting more and more tired with each passing second... eventually he quit, too tired to go on. He stayed there, trapped for several eternities... then he heard her voice, a voice familiar and warm and comforting. _

_"Naruto... please, wake up... I ... I need you to wake up. Your all healed now, I even managed to heal your muscles so you don't have to go through rehab... so please, please wake up."  
_

_Fire washed through him with her words, and like fire it burned away the cold liquid in his muscles bit by bit. " Grannny..." He somehow mumbled, pushing his voice with all he had, the release of pressure intense... so intense he almost fell back into the void. _

_"Naruto!" He heard her say, and once again he felt that surge of fire wash through him. _

_"GRANNY!" There was a pop and slowly he managed to open his eyes, the bright lights of the hospital room too bright but still he kept his eyes open, turning them towards the source of the voice... "Granny Tsunade!"  
_

_Her saw her, tired and worn but still beautiful. Her smile lit up her face and she seemed to become even younger then her transformation let on. "Your awake. Finally...I missed you kid." _

He hadn't been able to believe it... he died, literally died! Kyuubi was gone and he was weaker then ever, his chakra and body free from just having Kyuubi in his body. It was all too much...None of it hurt though, like hearing that Jiraiya only wanted to teach him because of the Damned Fox and so abandoned him. That hurt... a lot... It was only Tsunade offering to teach him if he proved him self in the next year that kept him from being too upset.

'_Stupid Pervy Sage... Damn him.' _Naruto had thought that a lot ever since he knew that little bit of trivia. '_I'll show him. I'll become Hokage without him!' _

Still, he didn't let it keep him down. He had a new mission, become Genin level and show everyone he wasn't just the Damned Fox! He hated having to read, it was stupid and he hated it, but he would do it if it meant being Hokage. It they could do it and needed to do it to become Hokage, then it was a needed evil, like eating vegetables ...

And so here he was, looking at a scroll that showed the Katas for the academy Taijutsu style. He had it open on the ground, and moved his body like it showed. It felt sort of awkward, he didn't like how rigid it was, but he was determined to pass. The consequences of failing felt more... real then they had before. The Old man had never made him feel like he would never have the chance to be a Ninja, he always gave him so many chances... Granny wasn't like that as much. She was stricter, meaner and meant what she said.

Thankfully she could be nice to him, and let him train away from the academy on a training field that his classmates didn't use. No one would know that he wasn't even a genin anymore. That was more then a little relief, he couldn't imagine the mocking he'd get from them all...

"Of course, Granny Tsunade said I could just tell them I was in rehab to get my skills back after being killed in combat..."He remembered her saying that, but still found the entire thing painful. He couldn't quite understand that whole dying part, he never felt dead... there was no light at the end of the tunnel, so feeling of weightlessness... he just was unconscious one minute and awake the next. That's it.

Only when he woke up, he was weak, tired and had a fraction of the power he used to have...

'_I'm never going to catch up to Sasuke now, I am so behind... I can't make clones, or use Rasengan or do anything like I used to! I can't even Summon a toad to help me... I only was able to fight Sasuke when I used Kyuubi's powers and now... now I can't do that. I need to work harder, be better!' _

Gritting his teeth at that thought, Naruto buckled down and looked back that scroll, moving with the Katas as best he could. He hated this, feeling so behind but there was nothing he could do... He was helpless... but he wouldn't be for long...

He would become great and powerful and fulfill his promises. First he would save Sasuke, then he would show Pervy Sage that he didn't need him, then he would become Hokage... All on his own if he had to.

Believe it!

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**Chapter end, tell me what you think in the reviews. **

**This was fun, interesting and just gets me started since nothing is showing up on fanfiction here... **

**Love, your Ninja Overlord, **

**Mika. **


	4. Costs of Life, Reminders of Death

**This is oddly hard, Naruto's personality is hard to write. **

**I am drawing some inspiration from Pulling my Weight, for the side scenes, as this needs those to work. **

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"NARUTO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING BACK IN THE VILLAGE!"

It was hard not to turn and smile, beaming back at Rock Lee as he barreled towards Naruto at high speeds. His joyful expression always left Naruto smiling and today was no exception. Turning fully, ignoring the wave of exhaustion that came with that act, he waited for his friend to approach.

"Hey Lee! I was really hurt during a mission, it damaged my chakra coils and my muscles so I am rehabing here in the village." He turned away, the kept his tone low. " My chakra is a lot lower then it used to be... so I am trying to catch back up to my old levels. Granny Tsunade is having me train hard for the next month. I have to build my muscles up too... I lost a lot of my power."

Lee blinked for a moment. "That's terrible news! At least you are alright, I too had to recover hard when I was hurt during my fight with Gaara. If you like I can show you what I did to get better as fast as I could?"

It was Naruto's turn to blink, shocked at the offer. Then he smiled, a wicked nasty smile imagining fighting as powerfully as Lee did. '_If I worked as hard as Lee does, I'd be Hokage in no time!' "_Sure Lee! It's been really hard, we could train together."

"Yosh, you should join me before we go and train! The other Rookies and I are going to go eat barbeque. Today is the first day we have all been in the village since you left. We have been on missions constantly, so we were going to celebrate."

A rush of uncomfortable heat that he didn't understand washed through Naruto, his hands started to shake. "Sure." He said, walking side by side Lee in a comfortable silence as they hurried towards the restaurant. It took about ten minutes to reach it and when they did, Naruto saw that there was a table in the far corner filled with his friends and classmates. They looked excited and happy around each other, comfortably chatting with random people. Eventually Kiba, with his keen sense of smell, turned and smiled.

"Naruto, your back?" His smile was a mile wide and Naruto laughed at his earlier feeling. There was no need for it, he was safe here.

"Yeah, accident during a mission. I got pretty beat up, have to go to rehab while I'm here for the next month or more." he smiled at everyone as they all had finally turned to him with various expressions of happiness and confusion. Even Shino seemed pleased... though Naruto knew he was probably reading into it.

"RUFFF, RUFF!" Akamaru, sitting on Kiba's head, barked out, panting with a confused look on his face.

"Huh, what do you mean his chakra is weaker then before?" Kiba turned up, looking at Akamaru who barked more. "He smells dead, what sense does that make?"

The world started to shake, swirling around him, his breath hot and heavy.

It only centered itself when Lee put a hand on his shoulder, concrete and strong it anchored Naruto to the real world. "It's exciting, right! Let's eat!" With those strong hands, Lee guided Naruto to a seat and he plopped down beside him, next to a happy looking Ino and a very smiley Choji.

Across from them was Kiba and Akamaru, Shikamaru, Shino and a very flush faced Hinata.

"Hi everyone, miss me." He kept on a glassglow grin, even as that sense of discomfort returned seeing these faces look at him. Something felt wrong, inside, he just couldn't explain what.

"Yeah Man, why are you back and why do you smell so wrong?" Kiba leaned in, sniffing a few times across the table. "Akamaru's right, you smell weird. Sort of dead but I can't be sure."

"Kiba, perhaps it would be best to not be rude. Why you ask, because Naruto just returned and may not want to share the cause of the change to his sent." Shino's dull tone left Naruto at ease, he couldn't help the slight sigh of relief he felt rush through him. "How have you been Naruto?"

Finally an easy question. "I'm good, I'm going to be in the village for..." He froze, a realization passing him that stripped him of a lot of his happiness. "For a while." He landed on, realizing that he was home for good. Jiriaya had dumped him, like Kakashi had, like everyone else had... The spinning feeling returned. "I, uh... I had, I was attacked during a mission... my chakra coils were damaged pretty bad. Granny Tsunade had to remake them bit by bit... I lost most of my power, my chakra, my strength,... I am basically a new genin starting out, a fresh genin, so I have to restart making my body. That's why I am so much weaker and that's why I smell dead I think."

"At least you are alive, I heard from Sakura that you died." Ino's voice drew Naruto's attention where he saw that she and Neji was approaching them from the entrance. Neji seemed taller, and Ino's hair had grown out a lot. "Your chakra really is so much weaker now, it used to be stronger then our entire class combined but now... now your only a little stronger then Sasuke's chakra."

Naruto nodded, ignoring the sharp pain that crossed his heart at the mention of Sasuke. "My chakra is double Sasuke's, that's what Granny Tsunade said. It used to be fifty times greater and really dense." He recited Tsunade's words, trying to hold on as the dizziness turned into lightheadedness. '_I feel like a damn ghost.'_

Hinata squeaked out suddenly, as Ino and Neji scooted onto the long benches, Neji on Naruto's side and Ino on Hinata's. "What accident did you have, Uh,,, Na..nanarnaruto." He looked at her, seeing her shaking with a deep red in her face.

That's when everything started to go blurry, his breath no longer staying in his chest.

"I, uh,... It... I..."

"I heard he died at one of Orochimaru's bases." Ino's barked out, not seeing Naruto struggle to breathe, to live. "Ran off and got bit by something that killed him. Tsunade Sensei had to revive him entirely, but his chakra network basically restarted so he has to start from scratch."

Darkness blossomed in waves and Naruto felt his muscles turn to jelly. He was about to collapse entirely, his chest frozen and no longer pumping air about, when the visions started.

_"You bastard! This is for Sasuke!" Naruto and his clones charged his enemy, a massive sludgy looking guy with orange hair and grey skin. He reeked, filling the concrete halls with a horrible scent Naruto could almost taste. "I'm going to kill you, RASENGAN!" Naruto, hand stretched out with his clones, thrust the Rasengan out and into the belly of the beast._

_Only to be slapped away, smashing painfully into the walls. The world spun as he struggled to stand, the familiar burn of healing washed through him but before he could recover the beast was on him, grasping his throat with cold claws. "REEEEEEEEEEECK!" It screeched, slamming him again and again into the wall, cracks and dust filling the air. After what felt like an eternity it dropped Naruto on his butt. _

_Then it bit him, and sheer agony exploded through him. Liquid fire washed through his veins, his skin burning cold, his muscles tensing. _

_Something clicked in his brain at that moment. _

_' I am going to die' _

"INO!" Neji's voice, strong and cold, cut through her gossip and he reached over, grabbing Naruto with his cold hands. "Breath, you need to breathe."

Naruto looked at his face, slurring and blurring in the fading light. "I died... I died... I died..." Tears, hot and salty, fell down his face as finally he collapsed into Neji's chest, and everything went dark.

'''

Neji and the rest of the Rookies shot across the streets, Naruto on his back as they hurried towards the hospital. He kept focused, even as he heard the others chattering.

"What was that?" Kiba said, his voice filled with worry.

"A panic attack, I think." Shikamaru said, his voice oddly worried. "I've had a few of them, after the Sasuke retrieval mission. I can't believe I missed the signs, he looked like a ghost from the moment he came to the restaurant."

Ino finally chirped out. " Why though? It takes serious trauma to start getting panic attacks."

Neji, done with stupidity, turned to the girl. "He died, you said so and so did he. That is rather traumatic, don't you think?" The foolish girl flushed a deep pink and shut her mouth. "Whatever happened to Naruto, that weakened him as much as you said it did, has to have been a life or death event. Naruto held up for a while but even he cannot handle that kind of trauma without some kind of side effect. As a medic in training you'd think you'd get that."

The rest of them went quiet the entire way to the hospital, where they reached the receptionist as fast as they could. Neji, carrying Naruto on his back, was the first to approach her.

"Ma'am, Naruto Uzumaki has recently had what I presume to be a major panic attack and passed out. We were not entirely sure what to do, so we brought him here."

The women, a blonde like Naruto only with grey eyes, blinked at them for a moment before a gasp came to her lips. " That poor boy, I remember when Jiraiya came here with him... the condition he was in, no wonder he had a panic attack. Nurse Ida!" A nurse with red hair popped out of a room to the side of the desk. "This young man passed out from what may have been a panic attack, can you assist him please?"

Within moments Naruto was taken from them and carried on a cot into a new room, where the nurse named Ida examined him with various objects and jutsu. After a few minutes she returned and turned to the Receptionist. "Call Lady Tsunade."

"Is he alright?" Neji ignored Ino and Hinata's gasp when this was said, but he understood their panic. Tsunade wasn't called just for any case, on the most severe and heartbreaking like with Lee's previous injury or with Naruto's apparent death...

Ida turned to him with a warm smile. "Naruto has no family, so Tsunade is his emergency contact as she is the Hokage and his primary Doctor. You were right, it was a panic attack."

Neji felt ease wash through him at that, but he didn't buy the women's statement fully. Something felt off. The moment she was gone, he turned to Naruto's room and activated his Byakugan.

_'His chakra is entirely different, it has none of the density it had before. The amount is far less as well, just as he told us... but that's not all. These coils, their far smaller and less developed then before. Even his chakra points seem smaller. Not only can he produce less chakra, his body cannot use any where near as much as it once could. Then there are his muscles, they seem to have been reduced in size, as if Atrophy has kicked in... but that makes no sense, how long could he have been in bed for... unless he loss his old healing factor... Ino said he lost a big source of chakra, could it be that red chakra that looked like a fox? The reason he beat me in battle... I will have to just ask him for answers, when it is safe too do so. Of course...' _

He would have gone and sat down, but then Tsuande walked into the room, just as Naruto started to wake up... and Neji just couldn't pull himself away from the conversation. No matter how not his business it was.

_'''_

_'What happened?' _Naruto groaned inside as he slowly awoke, the familiar stink of the hospital air and it's horribly bright lights drawing him back to the real world. "Why do I feel so heavy?"

There was a grunt, making him turn to see a very, very sad looking Tsunade. "Panic attacks will do that to you. Your lucky your friends found you, who knows what would have happened if they hadn't been there."

Naruto frowned at her, confused. "Panic attack?"

"Your body went into Fight or Flight mode but instead of picking it got stuck and you couldn't breathe. You passed out at the restaurant." Tsunade frowned at him. "Has this happened before?"

"No... I saw things... before..."

Her eyes narrowed. "What things?"

"The beast attacking me... slamming me into the wall again and again... then it bit me." He shuddered, the memory of his death haunting him. "I... I never realized that I died. Even when you told me it just... wasn't... real? Like a clone, it looks real but it's not... then it hit me, all at once. I couldn't breath, I couldn't think or see... it was all... It was like being hit with a rasegan to the chest. Is that normal?"

"Normal as in it is something everyone gets, no... is it normal as it expected for what you went through... yes." Tsuande sighed. "What you went through, Naruto, was something I wouldn't wish on anyone. You died, literally died, you only came back due to sheer luck. The Kyuubi's chakra in some of your cells, those that had yet to die from the Sage chakra infusion, was something I was barely able to use to restart your heart and force your body to heal from the damage. It's the reason your Whiskers are fading, but more importantly it was our lucky break. I think you didn't understand just how close you were to being no more, and that is a lot for anyone... I imagine you might start seeing other things as well, things that you haven't dealt with so, to ensure you can come back to combat, I will be putting you in therapy with Inoichi Yamanka himself."

Naruto cringed at that, but didn't argue for once. " This was scary, scary then anything I have been through. Even when Sasuke put his hand in my chest, or when we fought Orochimaru... it was like my body was my enemy... but wait, I can't get therapy, I have to train or I can't become a Genin again!"

"Naruto, you need help. If you have a panic attack in battle you could get yourself and other's killed."

"But-"

"NO! Your going to therapy and that is the end of it." She growled out. "Now... as for your training... I have an idea. NEJI, I KNOW YOUR WATCHING! GET INTO THE ROOM NOW!" Naruto turned to the door and saw an embarrassed Neji all but crawl into the room. Tsunade, oddly amused, all but smirked at the poor Hyuuga. "The Byakugan has a very obvious chakra signature if you know to look for it. I am very familiar with it, so it wasn't hard to notice. Besides you ooze intent, which is easily sensed. Work on that."

"Yes, Lady Hokage."

"Now, onto my idea. I want you to give Naruto some tips on managing his chakra. You Hyuuga's are masters of chakra control, I am sure you could teach him over the next few days along side... Lee? Yes, Lee, to get him able to train his body and chakra so he can at least remaster then rasengan and taijutsu." She turned back to Naruto. " Chakra is made up of Physical energy and Spiritual. These two are masters of both, since Lee has the most powerful body of your generation and Neji is the most capable in chakra control and they both dominate Taijutsu. They may not be able to teach you their styles but they can give you tips to master your own and increase your control and reserves. If you better your control, learn exercises that help with that, you might be able to do the rasengan by the months end without a clone. Conditioning like Lee does and learning control exercises will also increase your chakra reserves which may allow you to make a clone one day, so there is that as well. Does this sound like a good idea, Naruto?"

Naruto could not help but beam a smile, but it quickly faded as he turned to Neji. " Is that okay with you?"

"You taught me that Fate has no power over my life. Death will have no power over yours. I know that you are no longer a genin any more. If Lee and I get a few days to work with you, to prepare you for returning to service, we will make sure you are more then ready. I am more then happy to help you Naruto. I assume we only have a few days?"

Tsunade nodded. " I can only spare you for three days before you will have to do patrolling the borders or being sent on a mission. Between the two of you, this should be enough to get him on track. Taijutsu, conditioning, throwing skills and chakra control... with your help he can get at least these factors to Genin level. Can you keep his status a secret? I know you read my lips about Kyuubi's chakra and Naruto's status as being no longer a genin."

"Of course, I know a thing or two about keeping a secret."

"Wonderful, then so be it. Starting tomorrow you and Lee will be teaching Naruto, giving tips to make him as skilled possible... and yes he is cleared medically for weights, but keep Lee from going out of control."

"Right."

And for the first time since he died, Naruto really felt alive... and more then grateful that at least some people cared about him even in others like Jiraiya and Kakashi didn't.

"Oh and beat some strategy into his head while you can, that is something he really needs help with. Tactically he is great but long term... he really needs help."

"I will do my best."

* * *

**Chapter end, tell me what you think in the reviews. **

**I actually planned out the Lee and Neji bit a while ago, they won't be teaching him for a full month but they will have enough time to set him on a good course...I wanted to showcase that in reality they are the best options for teachers as they have each what he lacks... Taijutsu skill, conditioning that is earned, strategy and great control." **

**Love, your Ninja Overlord,**

**Mika. **


	5. Training and signs of potential

**I am drawing at least partially from Sora to Make Naruto's character and skills. I like the skill set of Sora and feel that they fit Naruto at least a little while still being unique.**

**I was going to have Naruto build himself up entirely on his own but I realized that if I wanted to keep the friendship thing Naruto is all about it would be cool and right to have his friends repay him by at least giving him tips and some advice. **

* * *

"Alright Naruto, let us begin! Show me your youth!" Lee bellowed at Naruto, before falling into a runner's stance. "I want one full lap around the pond as fast you can, without your weights! Then I will see how far along you are in sheer speed and where you need to be."

Naruto gulped a little, speed had never been his strong suit. It was actually a big black mark on his skill set, and why he felt he was so powerful with Kyuubi's power. It made him very, very fast. Or it had... "Okay Lee." Naruto fell into a runner's stance, and turned towards the Lake.

"GO!" Lee called out and Naruto shot off as fast as he could, rushing around the lake with great speed... or so he tried. He could almost feel the eyes of Lee on him as he sprinted around the pond. The pond itself wasn't that big but still Naruto took almost a full four minutes to get to the other side, reaching Lee with only a mild huffing. Lee was frowning. " Four minutes... that should have taken you less then a minute...even when I first graduated it only took me forty five seconds. Now I can do it in five without my weights. Your speed is seriously behind... it is a good thing we have weights on you. From now on I want you to do twenty five laps around the pond every morning before you work out. Then wind sprints, twenty five in each direction across the lake. That should be a good starter and help with your chakra control too."

Naruto groaned, not bothering to hide the sound. "What else do we have to test?"

"Your strength, punch my hand as hard as you can." Lee held out his hand, waiting for Naruto.

"Okay, at least I know I'm kinda strong." Naruto reeled his fist back and let loose, slamming into Lee's palm as hard as he could. There wasn't any movement...

And yet Lee was actually smiling. "Your actually kind of strong, stronger then I was when I graduated by far. I think in six months you might be almost as strong as I am now." That lifted Naruto's spirits considerably. " I want one hundred kicks and punches against a tree, if you cannot do that then you must do one hundred pushups, then one hundred sit ups, then one hundred squats!"

Now he was pale. "That's a lot Lee, do you really think I can do all of that?"

"And more! Lady Tsunade said you have a minor healing factor that will make you get stronger faster, so we have to really challenge you if we want you to get strong. Your muscles have already atrophied without the Kyuubi to keep you in perfect shape."

Naruto's eyes bugged out. "You know about the Kyuubi and how did it keep me in shape?"

"Lady Tsuande told me so I would understand why it was so important to train you, but she had me sworn to secrecy so I will carry it to my grave. I swear on my youth!" Naruto cringed, the sound of Lee's yelling was pretty hard on his ears. "As for how it kept you in shape, she said it made you flat out regenerate not just heal so it was keeping you in shape despite your lack of a consistent training regimen."

That was another hit to his pride, Naruto had realized how many perks he had gotten from the Kyuubi. '_Regeneration from wounds, kept me in shape, massive chakra pool so I could make a million clones... what else did it do for me?' _He really wondered if he would have gotten this far without the Fox to give him so much power, power that he had relied on to the point of exclusion. _'Was I ever anything without the Fox?' _

"Now I want to asses your taijutsu! I have permission from Gai to teach you the basics of the Strong Fist so you can have a style fitting your personality. Your a more upfront fighter then most, like I am! It is most youthful!"

"Really!" Naruto was excited now, he had seen just how powerful the Strong Fist was first hand. It was an amazing style, capable of making Lee and Sasuke able to hurt and back even Gaara into a corner. "Yatta! I'm going to be the best Strong Fist user there is, Believe it!"

"One goal at a time Naruto." Lee's words stopped him, and he was shocked to see how serious Lee looked. "It is something Gai Sensei has taught me. Every big goal and dream has to be broken down into a lot of little goals. Master the basics of the Strong Fist and Get your body into decent shape, capable of handling the strain of this style."

"But how do I break that dream up?"

"Increase your speed and strength by slowly increase your weights and following your training regimen every day. Go through your Katas to master the form and actions needed to call yourself a true Strong Fist User. Be cosistant, precise and dedicated to daily, hourly training. That is the key to my success and Gai Sensei's success. We take our dream and make it into a series of smaller goals. For you I would say master the basics and get your speed to the point you can run a lap around the pond in one minute. Be able to do my work out program without hurting your hands and not going home very sore.

Oh and I forgot, you cannot only eat Ramen! You have to eat veggies and fruits and meat to get your body to the point it can handle the strain and damage that will happen to your muscles. You cannot afford to not have enough protein and vitamins and minerals if you want to become strong. I know you do not like veggies but there are ways to cook them in a way that they taste great. I found a few cookbooks in the library you can look at."

Naruto wanted to groan. " I have vegetables but... if it helps, I'll eat them."

"A youthful attitude, you will surely succeed with that Naruto! Now, come at me and I will asses your Taijutsu. I may be a strong fist user but I know the academy style as well!"

:::

By the time Neji walked onto the training field, Naruto was all but crawling away from a very enthusiastic but not impressed Lee. Sloppy, Slow and Weak, that was how the normally nice Genin described Naruto's taijutsu style. Or absence there of, it was painful to hear, to see Lee's disappointed face. However that didn't seem to deter the boy. Instead it motivated him to show Naruto proper stances, correcting him patiently. They had gone through both the academy and Strong Fist Styles and it became clear that Naruto was more attuned to a style like the Strong Fist then he was the Academy style. So they scrapped the academy Style and Lee swore to write for Naruto a series of scrolls to study from, with Gai's help, so he could master the basics stances and get a foundation growing by the month's end. He also would be giving Naruto a series of scrolls to workout with and brought him weights he bought with his own money...something Naruto almost cried about, though he hid it well.

It was oddly uplifting despite how sore he was, that someone was giving him this kind of proper attention. He couldn't remember the last time anyone gave it to him, actually tried to help him in any real way...

"Naruto... are you alright?" Neji leaned down, looking at a smoldering, miserable looking Naruto.

Said Uzumaki let out a loose groan. "I'll live, but Lee's insane... still, if I work this hard I might catch up after all."

"If you work as hard as Lee or I do, you will surpass either of us. That I am sure of... now, I do believe it is my turn to teach you. Lee, Gai Sensei wants you to report to our normal training field."

Lee nodded. "Right! I will be there soon, my youthful friend!" Turning on heel, Rock Lee shot away at super speeds, a cloud of dust kicking up from his movements.

Naruto groaned again. " How is he so crazy? I'm still out of it... ugh." Slowly, Naruto managed to pull himself up from the ground. "What are we going to work on?" |

Neji smiled and sat down. "We are going to start with a discussion on Chakra. Tell me what is Chakra and how does it work?"

Naruto just blinked at him for a moment. "Uh, it's the stuff that makes Ninja powers work."

"Sigh... yes, technically it is... but more specifically it is a mixture of Physical and Spiritual energy in the body being molded together for power... think of it like Ramen broth."

"What?"

The genius actually smirked a little. " Someone told me your very fond of ramen, so I started to think of analogies that might work. Ramen broth is a mixture of herbs and species and water. Think of Physical chakra like water, it comes from the body. Some people like you have a lot of physical chakra because their bloodline is strong or because they work out a lot. Lee may have little chakra over all but the quality of his physical chakra is immense.

The spices and herbs that go into Ramen brother is spiritual chakra, it gives chakra it's feel and potency. It is formed from experience, knowledge and meditation. The more you know, the more spiritual energy you have. Some bloodlines have stronger spiritual chakra like the Nara. When you mix these two together you get jutsu, but the mixture has to be just right. Now tell me Naruto, what happens if you have too much water in your broth?"

Naruto frowned. " I guess it gets watery and weak... so if I have too much physical chakra my chakra is too weak for the jutsu?"

"And too dense, to heavy... what about too much herbs and spices?"

"It gets too salty and spicy I guess... but if it's chakra then you get chakra that isn't dense enough but it too smart?" Naruto frowned. "I am a still a little confused about spiritual chakra."

"Well, here's an example. Your lacking in spiritual energy, so much so you cannot safely divide your chakra to make clones anymore. Before you forced your Physical energy you gained from the Kyuubi to force the jutsu. Now, without that, you cannot make chakra that is balanced enough to safely make clones. Think of it like intent, spiritual energy is how badly you want something. It makes your energy specific, makes it go from just energy to a jutsu. From chakra to a shadow clone, or a fireball or what have you. Think of it this way. Spiritual chakra makes the shape of a jutsu, and physical energy colors it in. Does that make sense?"

"Yeah, I get it. Physical chakra is the body of the jutsu and spiritual energy is the brains if it. The why is happens!" Naruto felt smart for once, he actually understood the lesson. "That makes so much more sense then what they taught me in the academy."

Neji's smile was as uplifting as Lee's promises. "Now, let's start on some techniques to work on your chakra control. You already know the tree climbing and water walking Jutsu, don't you?" Naruto nodded. "Good, that helps a lot. I am going to teach you three extra exercises that you can work on. The first is the Leaf sticking exercise, a very simple exercises that works on precision. The next is the Water separation technique, that is used for medics and Hyuugas. The Last is the chakra pulse technique, which is the basics for Hyuuga jutsu, but is also the premise for super strength, genjutsu dispersion and a variety of other techniques." Reaching over, Neji grabbed a small leaf from the ground and put it on his palm. "The trick is to let a tiny flow of chakra stick to the leaf, too much and it blows off. Too little and it won't stick. I want you to start with one leaf and you'll know you've mastered it once you've got at least ten leaves on your arms. Then you can move onto small pebbles to make it harder since they weigh more. It is actually really a simple technique but it does well in getting consistent flow to other parts of your body and is wonderful for patience and focus. You try."

Naruto smile could have lit up the room. "I remembered Iruka teaching us this when I was learning the Rasengan. I can do this." To prove a point, Naruto put the leaf on his palm and easily turned it over, where the leaf stayed perfectly still. "See! I wonder how many leaves I can do..." Five leaves later and Naruto was still smiling at a very happy and surprised looking Neji.

"Huh, that implies that your chakra control is easily chunin level... which we wouldn't have noticed since your previous chakra pool was well above kage level. It was like having a small dike in a lake the size of the village, of course...well that's a good thing Naruto. I want you to get up to ten leaves then move onto rocks, all while mediating. I'll give you scrolls for the other jutsu and show you them before I leave."

"Why meditation?"

"Why not? It is the single best way to bolster your reserves. Ninja monks, who meditate frequently, almost never have reserves less then Jonin level. This, combined with the Leaf exercise will help not only with your chakra levels and control but also with calm, patience and focus. Something you dearly need, my friend."

Naruto slumped forward, sighing. "I know... Granny Tsunade said that too."

"Lady Tsunade... Naruto I know you are not a formal person but if you want to be taken seriously then you need to heed the rules and regulations of being a Ninja. It is fine to call her that on a personal level but during missions or around other Ninjas you need to be respectful." Neji's eyes were stern, but not cold. "Trust me, it will really help if you wish to be Hokage one. It shows that you can act as a diplomat and politician, something vital to being Hokage."

That seemed to hit Naruto hard. "I never thought of it like that."

"Cause nobody bothered to explain it to you, I suspect... now, let's finish our training. We only have three days that I can help you. I want you to be a Genin again so I might fight by your side my friend."

And that almost left Naruto in tears...

""

With shaking hands, Naruto walked down the halls of the Hospital. Neji was at his side, leading him down and towards their target. They had cut off training early so he could lead Naruto to his first day of therapy. It was a nerve wracking experience, he had no idea what to think about it. What would the man treat him like, would he be too messed up to become a Genin again? Would be be banned entirely... he had no idea.

Apparently his fear was obvious to Neji, who smiled at him. "I have seen a few psychologists Naruto, and started regularly seeing one after you defeated me. She has been helping me overcome some of my issues. Do not be worried, they are trained not to be judgmental but to actually help you."

That definitely helped Naruto, who let out a long breathe. "Okay, thanks Neji... I... I needed that."

"Not an issue, now just be honest and do not hold back. They cannot help you if you are hiding your feelings. And try to be respectful, they are still your superiors."

"I'll try."

"That's all I ask... here it is." Neji stopped and Naruto saw a small sliding door with a label to the side.

**Mental Health Services**

**Head: Inoichi Yamanaka **

Gulping a little, Naruto walked into the room and waved goodbye to Neji. " Thank you for taking me here."

"Not an issue. Have a good day Naruto, I will see you tomorrow." And with that, Neji walked away, leaving Naruto to walk into the office by himself. The office itself was nice, with a light purple paintjob on the walls and calming plants in each corner. A lady was sitting at a receptionist desk, looking at him with a warm smile.

"How may I help you today?"

Gulping again, Naruto walked forward. " Naruto Uzumaki, and I'm here to see Inoichi Yamanaka."

"Ahh, I just need you to fill out some paper work and we can get you in right away." She handed him a clipboard with some papers, and then handed him a pen. "Fill that out and sign at the bottom of each page."

'_Not a terrible start, I guess...' _

* * *

**Chapter end, tell me what you think in the reviews. **

**This was so much fun to write, a real good training chapter! **

**Love, your Ninja Overlord, **

**Mika. **


	6. First Days of Therapy

**This... was really, really hard but I drew inspiration from Pulling My Weight, a wonderful Sakura centric story.**

**I am beyond proud of this amazing chapter, I worked so hard on it... using my own experienced with therapy... **

* * *

"So what do you think, is he battle ready?" Tsunade leaned forward, putting her head in her hands as she looked at Inoichi. Her intent filled the room no differently then killer intent, melding with her immense natural presence that a gifted sensor like Inoichi could sense.

The man before her didn't fidget under her gaze or cower under her chakra, instead he met it head on, only sighing a little. "That is a complicated question to answer. Yes and no. Could he fight, yes, but the truth is Naruto is a deeply scarred person and not just from his recent death."

Tsunade frowned. " How so?"

"Naruto's life hasn't been anything I would recommend." He sighed again, looking world weary as only a worker of the mind could be. "He was isolated for most of his life, had no friends or family in his life. No teachers that would really help him, people calling him a demon or monster or who would just glare at him. Kicked out of shops and overcharged for food and clothes and whatever... even his graduationl, what should have been a happy memory, was marked with the trauma of learning his status as a jinchuuriki at the hands of Mizuki who not only tricked him into stealing the scroll but revealed the information in an attempt to hurt him despite the deep trust Naruto had for Mizuki. His mission to find you was marked with a near death experience when Kabuto tried to cut his heart off from his chakra network... His mission to Wave was met with the loss of someone who managed to make a tremendous impact on his life. His mission to retrieve Sasuke should have been fatal as Sasuke broke his neck and stabbed him with the chidori through the chest. The truth is Naruto has had more traumatic events then positive ones."

Cringing, Tsunade couldn't help but feel a wave of sorrow for the boy she loved so dearly. She had no idea just how much tragedy the poor boy had endured in his life "Naruto is a lot stronger then I gave him credit for it seems."

"Not exactly... Naruto is, what I can only describe, as suffering from Passive Suicidal ideation." He ignored the rush of air that shot through her nose as shock filled her entire being. "Naruto holds no care for his own life and will risk it for anything, any mission big or small. Any event that may possibly need it or even imply that it might be needed. He doesn't or didn't fear death until recently and now that he has had an actual death he is starting to value his life because he was finally confronted with the prospect of losing what little he had. He just isn't used to that, to that feeling. It is what is causing his issues, though the panic attack was more to do with remembering the trauma of his death as it hadn't hit him yet. He hadn't really remembered the actual dying part... "

"Is there more?" She dreaded to ask.

"Yes, but I would rather show you... at least some of it. But first, I should mention that as requested I used my Modification of the Psycho Mind Transmission Technique to open the boy's mind up. To my shock he actually resisted the technique on a passive level, this can only be done with the presence of a dual self. If he was still a Jinchuuriki I would have assumed it was due to the Kyuubi but it wasn't. It was due to the presence of a Yami, a compilation of Naruto's darkness and repressed aspects. Now, if you will, i would like to show you the rest."

Tsuande nodded and the man placed a hand on her head. In an instant she was thrust into a memory, the world shifting and resettling as she saw through Inoichi's eyes.

First thing she saw was Inoichi's office, a warm soft green with decorative flowers from his family's shop all on the corner of his desk. A picture of his wife and daughter on the mahogany desk. Inoichi was working over some paperwork when a knock door to Inoichi's office opened up, revealing an oddly timid Naruto all but slink into the room, his hands shaking ever so slightly. " Hello?" His voice was it's typical self, rough and gravely and just too high pitched for his age. Tsunade felt Inoichi's smile, and the surge of warmth that washed through him at the sight of Naruto.

A mark in the man's favor as far as she was concerned.

"Good afternoon Naruto, it is nice to meet you. My name is Inoichi Yamanaka, I believe you know my daughter Ino."

Naruto nodded. "Yeah, we graduated together." Naruto nervously sat down, twiddling his hands together. Tsunade, with her trained eyes, could easily register the fear, doubt and confusion in Naruto's entire being. "So, um, what do we do? I've never had therapy before."

"Well, that's really up to you and Tsunade. At the minimum we need to discuss your previous death, how it makes you feel... and I need to asses that you are ready for combat based roles once more. "Both elder ninja registered Naruto's spike in fear. "Naruto, it's going to be okay, I am here to help not judge you. My role is to help you help yourself. Really most of what we are going to be doing is just talking."

Naruto never saw the handsigns that Inoichi began but Tsunade could see them from the man's eyes. She felt his chakra stretch towards Naruto, opening his mind up to be read by the Yamanka clan head passively. She felt the resistance of what he had called a Yami, like a pressure against her forehead pushing down against her. However it was not match for the man's superior skills and he pushed right past it, allowing Naruto's mind to open up to his senses.

"Okay. " Naruto said, sighing. "Where do we start?"

"Let's start with your childhood... how do you feel your life was when you were younger. You would be amazed at how much childhood affects your older years."

Immediately painful images and sounds bombarded Tsunade mind. Naruto on a swing, listening to hateful speeches about his worthlessness, a man shoving him away from a shop and calling him a menance, being forced out of a dango shop and a sensation of intense hunger. Image after image bombarded her mind, hundreds of them in a wave of agony soul deep. What shocked and hurt her most was how young Naruto had been, barely four years old in some of the memories.

They didn't stop even as Naruto spoke, lying with his first breathe. "Oh, it was fine. I had the Old man Hokage and the Ichiraku and sometimes I had Choji, Shikamaru and Kiba when we played together. It could have been better, but there wasn't anything I could have done. Everyone but me knew about the Kyuubi being in my gut, so most adults hated me... that was..." Naruto didn't finish his sentence.

He didn't have to, as Inoichi sighed. " Naruto, you don't have to lie to me. I know your childhood was miserable, you were alone and isolated and hated for no reason you could have known. A childhood should be filled with love, laughter and protection, that you didn't get that is concerning and telling. Do I think it makes you a bad Ninja, no, but it is a concern we can talk about later... the truth is, and I mean this with the greatest respect, the Third Hokage horribly failed you."

Naruto threw himself onto his feet, his face filled with rage. "The Old man is the only one who cared or did anything for me, don't you dare disrespect him."

"Then why did he allow a child, four years old, to live on his own without any parental supervision or care. Why did he not reassure the village that you were not the Kyuubi, or do a great many other things that could have eased the burden that wasn't yours to face. Why lie to you your entire life then just expect a loyalty that to be honest, no one in the village earned in any way." Naruto opened his mouth to respond but could say nothing, he had no words it seemed. "He was a great man, Naruto, but he was just a man and that means he was capable of failing. Many people disagreed with the Hokage about how he handled your situation. I was one of them, but we had no choice but to listen to him."

Tsunade felt a wave of her own hate cross over, knowing how right the man was. The pressures of being Hokage, being perceived as flawless and the weight of the mistakes so easily made. Her Sensei rarely took action when it mattered, it was always something she resented about him but seeing how it affected Naruto only made her wish he was alive so she could sock him. Allowing a child to live on his own like that was... and to allow him to endure what he did without making moves to help him... it was disgusting.

What was worse was that Naruto didn't seem to realize how badly he was screwed.

She returned her focus to the memory and watched as a series of emotions crossed Naruto's face. "Other people weren't happy with how I was treated?" His voice was small, weak and pained, as if the mere notion of others caring for him was so foreign that he couldn't process it without feeling a deep pain.

"No Naruto, they weren't and you should understand, I am telling you this not to shame the Hokage but to get you to realize that it is okay to resent your past, to resent your pain and it's causes no matter who caused them. To heal means to embrace all aspects of your life and deal with each part. Neglecting to feel that resentment and own it, that will only hinder you and make it harder to heal...now, again, what do you feel about your childhood."

Naruto was quiet for a moment before tears started to cross his face. "It was awful, everyone looked at me like a monster. I wasn't allowed in stores or restaurants but Ichirakus. People thought I was too stupid to notice they were overcharging me. The teachers would ignore me if I needed help or if I was confused. No one really cared enough to think I mattered. After a while I gave up and stopped caring, I would do it on my own since no one else would help me.

But it was so lonely... it was all so lonely. I had no one, no friends, the Old man only came over every month to give me my money or to randomly take me out to eat. The others stopped playing with me after the first few times and Kiba became mean to me. Iruka wasn't super nice to me for a while and only became nice during the last year or so. Even then we only saw each other when he bought me food, outside of glass.

I started doing pranks to get some kind of attention, it was better then being ignored. Even if it was hateful and mean and calling me names, or yelling at me was better then just... nothing. That was the worst part, the nothing. I could handle the hate or meanness but when people wouldn't even look at me, or talk to me or nothing, I just... it hurt too much. I felt like I didn't even exist. I just wanted to matter, to be somebody, that's why I wanted to become Hokage."

Inoichi didn't stop himself as he rose and walked over to a flinching Naruto, hugging the kid tightly. " Naruto, I am very, very proud of you. Not a lot of people can be that honest with themselves or with me. That is a huge step for you if you want to heal, to become and be better..."

The memory ended then, and Tsunade found herself back in her office, looking at the world weary Inoichi. "You see what I mean? And that was just the beginning. The session was only an hour, we could only talk about so much. Most of the rest of what I saw, you know from the reports of being there, but that... that was the core of things. Naruto's got a serious problem with show boating and being flashy not just because he lacks attention and is childish, which he is, but also because he never mattered before and wants to show off so he matters.

I set the appointment back an extra half an hour so I could teach him how to meditate. I am going to try visualization exercises later but for now we are starting basic. I set him to see me weekly, every Wednesday. He needs help, a lot of it. His childhood screwed him over and so did all of the trauma, he has no idea how to deal with any of it. He is lost and he has been drowning for so long he thought it was normal. The panic attack, the death, only was the match that lit all a flame, there has been a pile building for a very, very long time.

His desire to matter is so strong it is what is making him suffer from Passive Suicidal Ideation. He needs to matter, it is as much a need as Oxygen to him. He cannot function without it."

Tsunade nodded. "I can see what you mean, and with his childhood... I cannot see him wanting to be Hokage any longer, once we manage to address his need to be needed."

"Maybe not. I could sense that he was far brighter then he let on or even realizes. He was sabotaged through neglect at the academy, and socially through isolation. If we can treat that and give him a better reason to be loyal, we might have an incredible Hokage. As it is I plan on giving him IQ tests. I may bring him in extra to do more assessments. I have so questionnaires that can help me diagnose him with other conditions and problems if they exists. I suspect he may have ADD, which may be hampering him even more. The truth is Naruto has needed help for a while in many ways so we are going to address many pieces of his life. I may even make him come visit me twice a week not once."

"If you think he needs it."

"He might... but my lady, do not give up hope. I see a lot of potential in this kid."

She smiled and nodded. " As do I."

What Tsuande didn't say was how tragic her first meeting with Naruto really was... how little he valued his life when he fought her, fought for the Hokage position not out of love or loyalty but to fill the void her Village had left in his heart. How willing he was to save her, when she was abusive towards him, solely out of how little he valued his life.

The entire situation reeked of tragedy and it broke her heart far more then she dare let on. She could only hope that one day, when all was said and done, that Naruto found the peace he had been robbed of his entire life... if not, he would never accomplish his goals and dreams, forever lost in pain so easily prevented. An endless cycle of tragedy that no on deserved.

Especially not Naruto.

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**Chapter end, tell me what you think in the reviews. **

**This was beyond fun to write and I am so proud of it. **

**Love, your Ninja Overlord, **

**Mika. **


	7. Progress comes and goes

**Stories with actual growth and long term planning is hard for me, I never got into it as I took lazy paths... I want this to be amazing and stand out so I am really trying. Please be patient and enjoy the ride. I am actually rereading old chapters to get a real look at this story and make it amazing!**

**This is not a Naruto Hinata story...**

**This is the end of the first arc, we get to see the next one soon, so this is why it is short. **

* * *

"In... and out... in and out... In and out..." Naruto breathed as Inoichi had told him, repeating the simple mantra slowly as he let go of his senses and just focused on his breathing. It was surprisingly easy, which Naruto didn't get. Inoichi said that even masterful Ninja's struggled with meditation and Naruto knew he was far from a masterful Ninja. Humans just weren't meant to be still for so long, and Naruto could feel his skin practically crawling with the urge to stand and just do something but he kept to it, doing as the Doctor had recommended. He didn't get how it would help but the man really seemed willing to help him, so he would listen.

He wasn't sure how long he was meditating for as time sort of blurred... but at some point he felt a tingle, right at his left side. It was strange and annoying, like when you sit on your hand for a while or something... he tried to ignore it, but it was too strong. He wanted to open his eyes and growl at it, hoping it would stop.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING, NARUTO!" Lee's loud, loud voice suddenly slammed into Naruto, knocking him out of his meditation and sending him back in shock.

When he opened his eyes, looking at Lee, he was stunned to realize that Lee was at his right side... where the tingle had been.

_'Was it him, did I sense him?' _The idea was impossible, like all students Naruto had been tested for Sensory powers and he had come up blank. It was one of the few lessons he had paid attention to, the idea of just knowing where someone was had been too awesome to ignore! '_Unless my lesson was sabotaged like Inoichi said my education was. Maybe I am a sensor... I am so cool, believe it' _

Excited, Naruto turned his full attention to a curious Lee. "I was meditating, Inoichi, my counselor, said it was a good idea to try."

Lee's eyes went wide. "It is a good idea, it even helps with Chakra control and development on top of anxiety and stress. Gai Sensei has us all meditating!"

"I know that, Neji taught me all that yesterday... the doctor, Inoichi, told me it would help with my anxiety.. Inoichi said my anxiety is really bad, something about Suicidal Ideation... I didn't fully get it." Naruto noticed then that Lee looked very, very sad then. Putting his hands up, he waved them in his own desperation. "I am not going to hurt myself, that much I know for sure, but I guess it means I am too willing to die for others like on a mission."

Lee blurred away and when he appeared, his arms were wrapped around Naruto in a very tight embrace. "Don't die, please. Your one of my only friends and rivals, I can't have you dying before me."

Naruto was touched, having never expected that Lee cared so much. '_I have been getting a lot of hugs lately...' _They stayed like that for several minutes before Lee pulled back, very determined.

"Time for your training, let's see if you remember what we did yesterday! It is my goal to test you after you retest for the Genin exams, to see how far you've come in a month. If I am able to manage it between missions."

"I'd like that, a lot."

"""

With more aches then he could imagine, Naruto all but crawled to his apartment. His everything hurt, even his brain somehow. He had a terrible headache... "Ugh, why am I doing this? Is it worth it?" He groaned out, trying not to puke on his floor. '_I have trained hard before but never to the point that everything hurts like this, will it really make me more powerful... is it worth it?' _

Knowing that it was, despite his whining, Naruto slumped into a chair and grabbed a packet on his table. It was an academy review packet for the big test at the end of the year. Iruka, in his kindness, had given Naruto it so he could get a full scope and study all he needed to to at least pass the academy test. It was actually kind of helpful, with little notes detailing where to find the chapter in the academy books and scroll.

So, naturally, Naruto hated the damn thing.

'_Why do I have to know all of this crap, does the Hokage really have to know all of it... ugh...' _Naruto's head clanged against the table, moaning his position for only a moment before sitting up with a determined stare. " No, I won't be entitled... I may have just learned what the word means but I know I hated it. I hate being that person... and I hated being so helpless before. If I want to be Hokage then this is what I need to do."

And with that, Naruto struggled to devour the papers before him, using every note, letter and detail to soak up the information as best he could.

::

"You really think he can do it?"

Tsunade enjoyed the look of shame on Kakashi's lips as he the words slipped past them, old habits too strong to just get over. "What was that Kakashi? Could it be that you haven't been watching as Naruto absolutely killed it at his training, or how he actually managed to bunker down and really read his study guides and work his butt off to pass the academy tests to the best of his ability? Could it be that you didn't' realize, or care, that Naruto is actually quite smart but due to poor choices all around a genius like you never realized it? Hmmm, is that it?"

It was cruel of her, she knew, but Tsunade really couldn't help it. She wanted to impress upon the man the lessons he had so obviously failed to learn. Why was she doing this to him, after already punishing him... well a simple conversation with Sakura and watching the girl's chunin exam performance may have pushed Tsunade over the edge. Just a little anyway.

_'How anyone could ignore the sheer potential of both kids to such a degree is baffling. As a bystander I get, but as a teacher, it is inexcusable. Sakura is learning at a rate that is down right baffling, the girl will surpass me that is clear. Her knack for healing is incredible, her retention of knowledge is scary and her drive is unsurpassed. She could have easily made jonin by now had she had a good enough teacher early on._

_Then there is the boy... Naruto's taijutsu is already noticeably better now, and his chakra control is actually quite advanced for his age we just never noticed it due to the Fox but Kakashi should have if he actually tested their control beyond the tree climbing exercise. He has emotional issues, who wouldn't with his life, but his drive is beyond even Sakura's. I called him entitled, and he was, but all he needed was a firm hand and some guidance. I definitely owe him an apology and a present... maybe I will teach him medical jutsu? Not enough to be a full medic but enough to be useful. His control is far better, thanks to the Rasegnan I assume, then we realized so really he may have the capacity for it.'_

Satisfied with herself and her thoughts, Tsunade leaned towards Kakashi, leaning over the crystal ball they had been staring at to watch Naruto's hard core studying. She just couldn't wait for Kakashi's answer, whatever it was.

The man looked at her, melancholy clear on his face, even past the mask. "Must you taunt me?"

"You failed to train two, TWO very capable genin. Sakura is the brightest child I have ever met, period. She fills the gaps in her knowledge unlike anyone I have ever seen. She has already mastered the basics of medical jutsu, something that takes six months for most people. She did it in less then two weeks. Naruto is working harder and harder and soon I feel we will see just what he is capable of. Inoichi will be giving him an IQ test, and I think he will surprise us. You saw how much his taijutsu has improved, on a technical level alone and with just a few days of working with Rock Lee. I give him three months til he reaches chunin level in taijutsu alone. We saw his chakra control when he was working with Neji just a few minutes ago, he is better at control then some jonin I know, a byproduct of the rasengan.

I want you to see how badly you failed them, I want you to see exactly why you have been and are being punished. I want this lesson to be fully drilled into your skull so this neglect never happens again. Do not look away, do not doubt it. I want you to learn and you will. Your a genius, rare and true, and you will learn. Now go, I have things to do. Your dismissed."

;;;

It was getting late when Naruto started to meditate once more, and almost immediately he felt something tingle against his senses. To the left hand side, but only barely, like whatever it was was too far away for him to focus on. Curious he turned his attention onto it. Pushing and pushing his attention towards it, he slowly felt more and more of it. Several things became clear, first whatever it was was like a burning candle that was too far away. It was impossible to really gauge it's heat but you still see it's light. Second, whatever it was was human, it reminded him of Lee just brighter. Third and most important, it was focused on him too.

That last part he was unsure of, how he knew that was unclear but he knew it was true. It was like when someone was looking at you from a distance, and you could sort of feel their stare. He could feel their chakra, so he guessed, and it's attention was on him.

_'Who's watching me?'_

Curious and frustrated, he opened his eyes and followed the weird tingle out of his apartment. The moment he was on his balcony, he looked around and saw no one around, it was night after all.

_'Maybe I was wrong... no, I'll try again.'_ He closed his eyes and stretched out his senses and, lo and behold, he felt another presence just as before... it was running away but he knew where it was now.

Throwing himself onto the roofs he shot away, hoping from roof to roof until finally he was in front of the source, leaping down in front of them.

"Hinata?"

The timid girl squeaked in shock, backing up nervously. " Naru,Naru, Naruto." She whispered, shaking. "What, are you doing out here?"

" I felt you looking at me, I could sense you... pretty cool, right? I am awesome, believe it?" Then he stopped. " Why were you looking at me?"

The girl started to really shake. "I,..I... uh... I... goodbye Naruto." And like that, Hinata shot off, leaving Naruto standing in the middle of the road, looking at her back wondering what the hell just happened.

"She's weird... anyway, I can sense things! I am awesome! But why now? Was Kyuubi stopping me or... is there more to it then that? I should tell Gran... Lady Tsunade." Naruto gulped, thinking of how Neji told him to refer to Tsunade. Neji was really smart, maybe he did know better afterall. Naruto actually turned to run off to her, then stopped. " What if I surprise her, when I become a genin again... yeah, that sounds better... I like that."

And so he hurried home, excited to have something entirely new and epic to practice in and show Tsunade one day when he proved that he deserved to be a genin once again!

* * *

**Chapter end, tell me what you think in the reviews. **

**This was so much fun. **

**Love, your Ninja Overlord, **

**Mika. **


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